Where does my testimony lie?

It is so helpful for me to be able to separate Church from Christ's true gospel. And to acknowledge the fallibility of our leaders.  There are so many things that have changed in our doctrines and policy since the church was restored. Slavery, black people with priesthood and Temple blessings, mixed-race marriages, birth control, women being able to give healing blessings early in the church, teachings about suicide, and even the teachings about LGBTQ people have dramatically changed over the last few decades.

This recognition that we are all fallen,  and make mistakes, including the Apostles and leaders of our church keeps me in the church.  IT doesn’t take me out of it.    I would much rather believe that in the past we have had racist- homophobic leaders, than believe that my GOD is racist and homophobic.

Our church has no Monopoly on goodness, or on having a relationship with our Heavenly parents or Jesus Christ, or on personal revelation.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf said “We openly acknowledge that in nearly 200 years of church history — along with an uninterrupted line of inspired, honorable and divine events — there have been some things said and done that could cause people to question.To be perfectly frank, there have been times when members or leaders in the church have simply made mistakes. There may have been things said or done that were not in harmony with our values, principles or doctrine...God is perfect and his doctrine is pure, he said, but human beings — including church leaders — are not."

D. Todd Christofferson said "In the Church today, just as anciently, establishing the doctrine of Christ or correcting doctrinal deviations is a matter of divine revelation."

I just renewed my temple recommend.  Seems my bishop and stake pres have been reading my blog and wonder about my "issues" with the brethren.  I told them that I have faith in my Savior Jesus Christ.  I don't have to have complete faith in the Prophet.  I believe he is leading this church the best he can, and just because he was made prophet doesn't mean he loses his free agency.  It doesn't mean he becomes a puppet and God is a puppet master.  This would go against everything we fought for in the pre-existence.  

So.... with all of that......where does my testimony lie? Mine lies in my Savior Jesus Christ and His grace.  It lies in the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon and what I learn about my Savior and His Atonement in it. This anchors me and keeps me All In even when some parts of my religion I continue to question.