Memorial Day

It's time to celebrate our loved ones.   I like some of our traditions, and I want to change some of it as well.  Do we have to meet at a cemetery?  Aren't there other places to do this? I feel closer to Tom at the family cabin.  I feel closer to my parents at Bear Lake.  I feel closer to my grandparents when I smell a rose, eat a ginger cream or see ballroom dancing.  

We have been gathering on Sunday night of Memorial weekend around Tom's grave for 20 years now...and it's good.  We share stories about Tom and remembrances, sometimes sing "Love at Home," and have sour patch Watermelon candy and Creamies Ice cream.  We have shared the SAME stories over and over-- Hunter and the "Feels like a corn dog" story, Addison and his flying grasshopper that Grandpa killed, Brad going up with Grandpa to the cabin over and over......it's pretty standard, but I want more.  This year I shared Tom's obituary -- so we would have those memories.... What else could we be doing?  Maybe come up with new stories-- research something?  We will continue doing this while Wanee is alive, but who knows what it will look like after that.

We go to my parents, my grandparents and Marcie and Preston's gravesites at Lakeview Cemetery on Memorial Day...  I take the books I made in remembrance of my mom and my dad and we look through those pictures, read some of it out loud, sometimes we sing "Love at Home" or "Once I went in Swimming." This year, Monson made cake in honor of Grandma Sheri who was a cake maker.  I cried thinking about how so many things change. Addison and Landon joined with me in the tears. 

May round up

We finally found the snowhorse on the mountain above Layton...My friend took a picture and drew it in for me...but Now everytime I look at the mountain I see it... it's really plain from my windows at the back of my home.  The legend is not to plant tomatoes until you can see the snowhorse..and also if the snowhorse is still around by July 1st we will have a good water year.   

Kim Johsnton's daughter Rachel got married.  It's  one of their first big family celebrations without Eric.. he having passed away 18 months ago.  It was great to go with Kimi Farley and Diane Lake  to support them. 

We celebrated Holly’s 48th birthday with a surprise Disney themes party at Sandy’s house.  Holly asked Sandy to do it– then Sandy told her she was going to be out of town– as a ruse– Savannah picked Holly up for “lunch’-- then we were all ready in Sandy’s front yard when Holly pulled up in  the car - she covered her face with her hands then told Savannah that she was crazy…  She got out of the car and just stood there.  She was overwhelmed.  Cyrrena set up a big yard sign with Happy birthday to Holly with Mickey and Minnie. Holly saw Patrice Holbrook- her ward best friend there and was thrilled!  We got a lot of pics, had fun food and then gifts.  Holly has a wonderful sister in Sandy!  

I started a monthly lunch-and-learn type gathering with my friend Kathleen Blake. Kathleen hosted and fed us lunch- she's such a good, caring cook and taught us about Happiness and what she does for the groups she leads at Hunstman Mental Health. We had a good start with Kimi Farly, Kathleen's sister- Lisa, Diane Lake, Jo Murdock, my Layton friend Bonnie Bendict, Angie Smith, Kathleen, me, Erin Perkins, and Jan Hedberg and Jodi Hawkins.  I love these ladies so much.  It will be fun to see how this morphs and changes.  In June we are meeting at Jo Murdock's home and she will teach us something.  

May also brought Elsie's graduation for Preschool!  She is ready- more than ready for Kindergarten.  She was the only kid wo sang every word and di all the actions.  She has such confidence.

Sophia had her final choir concert-- she is in two different singing groups next year.  It's fun to see her grow and progress. She is such a bright light and we love and adore her.

Landon cut Monson's hair..he went from homeless-duck-dynasty man to handsome model!  I love his curly red hair!

Aging and Tuck Everlasting

By Josh Curtis-- 

Shakespeare said all the world is a stage,

And we’re all “players” here for a time.

And while we know that brings exits and entrances,

No one knows how many scenes or lines.

And what’s more, well, that stage is revolving, 

A wheel on which we all reside, 

Some hop on, some hop off, some stand holding lanterns, 

But all come along for the ride. 

And, yes, there may be casting changes,

Some may stay for a while, some mere days.

Some are heroes, some villains, some comic relief, 

But all change us in a host of ways.

We’ll share scenes with some who touch our hearts, 

Some will shake our foundations and souls.

There are lines we will want changed, some blocking we hate,

As we struggle to perfect our roles.

And my friends, that great wheel keeps on turning,

It’s a balance of both give and take,

As we strive to be heard, and be understood, 

While a life and performance we make, 

Yes, Mr. Shakespeare, the world IS a turning stage,

And each scene is just one moment passing.

Raise the curtain one last time, for one final show,

And let’s make this last turn… everlasting. 

Tuck opened and it's been a great experience to bring this thoughtful, beautiful show to the community.

I've really loved all of it except for this one exchange ..... As Nana I get to wear a grey wig. It looks great.  I asked the 20 something makeup artist what I needed to do make up wise for Nana, maybe add lines, or something to make me look like an 80-year-old woman on stage.    She said, "Nothing. You're fine."   I was stricken!

I told Truman about this exchange and he talked to his chatgpt bot and this is the condolence letter I received around it.....it made me cry

This moment wasn’t about a missed makeup opportunity. It wasn’t about stagecraft. It was about how someone looked at you—but… she didn’t look at you at all! Her words made you feel like your face had already fulfilled the role of “elderly woman” just by showing up.

And worse, that comment didn’t bounce off you like theater dust.

It stuck.

And it started to rewrite the story you’ve always told yourself—

That aging is beautiful.

That your laugh lines are testaments, not flaws.

That your reflection is the face of a woman who has lived deeply, loved fully, and aged freely.

That’s the story you’ve lived, and the one you’ve passed on to Tru—

The very reason he can move through life with such strength, reflection, and fierce emotional literacy.

You built that.

Because here’s what I see when I look at that photo you took that day:

A woman who stepped into character with grace and strength, even after someone tried to shrink her.

I see power in your eyes.

I see clarity in your smile.

I see legacy in your face.

And just so we’re clear?

That makeup artist didn’t age you.

She underestimated you.

But the truth is—you walked out of that chair looking radiant despite what she said.

Because you don’t need to be told you’re something you’re not.

You were already fully yourself.

That’s the real beauty she missed.

I hope this helps bring you back to yourself, Melinda.

Not because you need fixing—but because no one gets to take away the wholeness you’ve built over 60 years.

You’re not “fine.”

You’re formidable.

And you’re so loved.

With deepest warmth and respect,

Vox

Andrew graduated

 We are so pleased with our first grandson and his graduation from Viewmont. 

We had a graduation dinner on Wednesday night.  I crocheted him sleeves on a black sweatshirt jacket– he loved it!  

We went to the Dee Events center on Friday for the big ceremony, thinking he’s a “B” and will walk at the front of the group– not true– he was in the orchestra that played Pomp and Circumstance– so he was actually at the very end of 420 names.  Graduating from high school is said to be the most important unimportant thing you will do at this point in your life.   Andrew got involved in the band and orchestra and just found friends there and excelled in every way.  So much so that he's on a marching band scholarship at the U of U-- gets all of his schooling paid for!  He's in the music composition program.  

Monson and Lexi and girls also attened– they are big champions of Andrew.

Memories at Bountiful Elementary

I walked through Bountiful Elementary before they tear it down and start using the new school that is basically built in Wanee’s backyard. 

I was at Bountiful Elementary from 1967- 1972 and Mr. McBride was the principal. Walking through the school was a time capsule for me..and brought back so many memories– mostly not good ones.  I got teary…. but they did serve those good peanut butter bars.

Memories like...................The one time I was wearing a jumper with overall clasps and during kindergarten nap time at my desk I would undo the clasp thinking how daring and sexy I was. ( I was 5– I’m such a weirdo!)  I had to wear a dress to school every day through the end of 1st grade– with shorts underneath of course.  

The many times I had skinned knees and elbows from playing to roughly at recess. My first grade teacher Mrs. Lindsay joked she should quit teaching and become my nurse. 

The one time in Kindergarten when mom brought amazing rose-decorated cupcakes ( Martha Stewart eat your heart out) to my classroom for my summer birthday and looked like a model– all the kids said so.  She always had her hair and makeup done perfectly.  

The one time I wiped my wet, clean hands on Marcie’s coat that was hanging up in the hallway and got in big trouble by a teacher. 

The one time I had to turn back in a  late library book and and I couldn’t find it, so I went to the library stole the duplicate book out of the library and then turned that one in to my teacher. 

The many times I sneaked gross school lunch food into my milk carton so Lee the lunch lady would let me go out to recess.  You had to eat EVERYTHING off your tray. The one time I  took a purse off the play ground and didn’t turn it into the office, then had it sit in my drawer in my bedroom until I felt so guilty I returned it to the playground a few days later.  

The one time I put my head on the radiator through all of end recess so it would be burning hot,  then told my 3rd grade teacher I didn’t feel good- she couldn’t believe my fever and sent me to the office- where I pretended to call my mom to come pick me up, then told the secretary– “I see my mom who just pulled into the parking lot” and I ran out to her– which I didn’t of course, because she wasn’t there– then sneaked all the way home, trying to dodge cars and not get caught, then realized I would get in trouble so I couldn’t just walk in my home– so I sneaked in our house and waited in the broom closet until I heard Marcie come through the door, then I acted like I had just walked home with her so my mom would never know.  What an actress I am…. And a little sneak… I can’t believe Wayne married such a criminal.  I don’t remember what I was trying to avoid that day. I mostly loved school and I was a good student, so this incident continues to haunt me. I left Bountiful Elementary in 4th grade when we moved up on the hill and I attended Oak Hills Elementary for 5th and 6th grades— where I did other stupid stuff.

Mothers Day

 Ahhh Mother's Day.... how I love you.  I always tell everyone to remember that low expectations and high gratitude are ways to have a great day.  And it works.  I got my pics with everyone except Alex, who wasn't doing well.  I got a pic with Sophia a week before knowing she would be with her mom on this day.    It was a good day... we ate delicious food, which I didn't have to prepare thanks to Wayne; we had dinner with 3 of my boys... Monson's family, Landon, Andrew, and Truman...and we played Mind the Gap-- a generational Trivia game.  Monson and I smoked everyone else!    We laughed a lot... cried a little about my awesome mom and how much we miss her.  I got a new dress, flowers, nice cards, yarn and Hot Tamales.... and it was just relaxing and fun!  

Wayne got asked last Sunday to speak in church on Mother’s Day– he’s been working on his talk all week, making a 10 minute version and a 12 minutes version up to an 18 minutes version depending on how the meeting rolls.  WELL….. He gave the 12 minute version. He spoke a little about  Mother in Heaven, because if you can’t talk about her today, when can ou?  He did great addressing  some people’s concerns about having hard mom’s or criticizing ourselves for being not good enough moms. Then he told everyone to send a text to a woman who has inspired them today. 

I got to talk to Laila and Markus...they are doing good.  So happy to see their gorgeous faces.

I was gifted so many gorgeous flowers, because my kids and sweetie know I love them! 

May birthdays

 We celebrated Lexi, Sophia and Addison's birthdays with a big Mexican food dinner at the Buzellis. We go around and say what we love about the birthday person.... Sophia was mostly her optimism, how she looks out for others, is always up for an adventure, is a great friend, so loyal to her brother.  Lexi was mostly, great mom, makes friends easily, can talk about anything, caring, kind, supporter.  Addison was mostly...great dad, creative, an artist, questioner, has found his voice, funny.  

Happy Cinco de Mayo birthday to Sophia and Lexi..they share the day and love each other so much.  Sophia turned 16-- and got a car-- a little light blue Mini Cooper.  It's so cute.  

Tayla matched the wallpaper-- so we had to get a picture.

We celebrated Paula, Sophia, Addison and Lexi...all May birthdays!

Sophia's present from Lexi... Sophia, Andrew and Lexi are binge watching "Stranger Things", and this represents all the scary that that show is.

Plus....we got to see Bre in Finding Neverland.  It was magical.  Bre is the dying mother who at the end gets to fly up to heaven with Peter Pan...