Saturday, April 4, 2015

Landon is getting married

Landon is getting married to a  man this summer. 
I never thought I would write that sentence let alone be living it. I can wrap my head around sexuality and the partner-living together thing.  I believe everybody needs a somebody.  But this new way of marriage is extraordinary.
So how do I balance this seemingly dichotomized life of mine of faith and famiily?
How do I respond?
What do I "do" about this?
Well..... 
I don't do a thing.  I don't fight, cry, argue or get upset.  I don't do any of that...because at this point it's Landon's life. It's Alex's life. They will continue to make big decisions in their lives without consulting me first.  My time to influence and enforce any and everything I wanted to Landon is over.  Now I am his cheerleader, his shoulder to cry on, his listening ear, his soft place to land......and I take this part of mothering very seriously.

So, I will support and congratulate and do everything I can to make this a special day for them as they commit to a brighter  husband and husband future together. I will smile -and mean it,  and wear the appropriate wedding colors and be my very best self...because they deserve that.  I will walk my sweet Landon down the aisle and give him away. I will hug and kiss him, and celebrate with him, because we are family and because he is a love in my life.  

And afterward I will live my life so that all can see that I hold my family and my faith very close.

For me, being a Mormon is more than just my religion, it  is like an identifying characteristic...like my green eyes, or skin color.    The LDS faith is such a part of me... I was born to faithfilled parents, my dad was a bishop my mom a relief society president. And their parents and grandparents were a part of this religion as well. I was raised going to primary during the week having wonderful women who taught me, and more church meetings on Sunday.  As a teenager it was  hard for me to fathom that not all people knew what a Stake center was or a ward family. My faith is reflected in the way I dress and how I spend my days.  It's how we marry in Temples and extends to how we bury at hope-filled funerals. I love this religion even with all of it's unanswered questions and flawed members. (which includes me) It keeps me centered and sound.  It gives me perspective and peace. I am Melinda and I am a Mormon.  

I read the Proclamation of the Family over and over and I do believe eternal marriage is between a man and a woman solemnized in the Temple of our God.... but I know there are other types of marriages too. I have found this one part of the proclamation that sticks out to me more and more.--

THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

I see Landon as having other circumstances that needed individual adaptation.  

Bruce R McConkie said,  "We are at different places in life and have different pathways but as long as our feet are turned toward God we are going to be ok." 
Landon loves the Lord and he is a great person. 
I find it so sad that anyone, religious or otherwise, would push away or disown their child or family member or friend when they make a decision that goes against their beliefs or values. 
Why should we  even think in such a way when our goal  on this earth is to become more Christlike.  Religion is not meant to divide but to bring together.

  On mormonsandgays.org it states, 
"We live in an imperfect world. Not all the pieces of the puzzle seem to fit. But having an eternal perspective and believing in a just and merciful God gives us hope that all will work out in the end."

Which brings me back to my first questions.........How do I balance my life?  I turn it over to the Lord and find peace and comfort there.  
How do I respond?
I will respond with love.

1 comment:

Andrew and Gina said...

This is beautiful.
And CONGRATS Landon & Alex!