Big Risk

I haven't stepped on my scale since the end of September.....I don't want to be faced with my ballooning reality...
Since leaving the wagon, I have eaten my way through Wayne's operation, Laila's Emergency stay, Halloween, a family wedding and many birthdays.... and lets just say I'm good at eating to avoid my life.

Okay...no more denial. I'm going to leave the computer right now, run upstairs and tackle, er, I mean, jump, on the scale!!

This goes against everything I believe in. First, I am not na- k- ed and I'm not immediately out of bed having gone potty. I am dressed in my walking clothes- brown Velour pants, Ogden 1/2 marathon shirt, sports bra, underwear, running shoes, glasses; I have eaten breakfast--two cookies, an apple and a large water; and I have a full bladder.

But, I'm throwing all caution to the wind and here I go.......

Did you miss me?
Did you hear the scream coming from my upstairs bathroom?

Well it wasn't as bad as it could have been. I am 5 pounds up from my original loss of 8 pounds-- but if I subtract all of the above mentioned from the scale equation, I'm probably only 3 pounds up--- so still a total loss of 5 pounds from where I started in August!! Diet Math is hard.

Let's hear a Yeah for ME!!
Mr. Scale didn't get the best of me today.

What I've learned....avoidance leads to rationalization which leads to self delusion and finally elation.

I avoided the scale. I rationalized that I didn't need to know my weight-- what does it matter anyway? I kept my self in a state of delusion, just wearing my elastic waist clothes and finally I was elated when I jumped on the scale and was only up 3 pounds after 6 "hard" weeks.

Life is funny.